Today we’d like to introduce you to Isabella Degenhardt.
Hi Isabella, so excited to have you with us today. What can you tell us about your story?
She had long ink-black hair that strayed from her messy bun and a round face to compliment her full lips. Careful as to not miss any detail of the face with South Asian features, I studied the mirror intricately as dark brown hooded eyes peered at me. I wondered if the olive-toned shell covering my body labeled me as Asian. Was appearance the deciding factor in one’s identity? I grew up in Asia alongside an American household and experienced an international life unique to the average individual, so I was exposed to both contrasting cultures. Despite this, I still ponder who I am and which side my identity mostly relates to. I have always felt too American to be Vietnamese and too Vietnamese to be called American. I am an outsider to both sides of the cultures that define me. When people ask: “What is your nationality?” I struggle to shortly answer in a way that is not confusing and still maintain true to myself. Every day I progress to dissect and analyze the true meaning of my confusion, and I have found the core problem does not lie in finding out how to answer that question but in figuring out where I belong. As I experience life with my mixed background in an Asian country, yet a Western environment, it dunned to me that I will never “fit in” a certain category, and that is completely fine. My aspirations and values can never be characterized by a single word or phrase, and that makes my identity unparalleled.
A sense of pride fills me when I think of my Asian background, but I also feel the same towards my American side. I view this as my own way to connect both heritages. Even in intense times when millions were protesting equality for Asian lives, and everything seemed divided, I remained neutral and equally sympathetic to both sides. It is clear many people are slowly gaining knowledge of the prejudices that exist in not only Asian races but across all races. My dual identity allowed me to recognize early on that inequality is not inherent in just one race but rather in every race because “equality” means viewing all races as one. The nature of my values is connected to my identity, and I am thankful for the unique capability I was gifted in this life. I desire to use my unique perspective to inspire and embolden the pride of other races towards their own culture and identity. It is essential to be comfortable in your skin, and I want to help others discover that contentment.
For as long as I can remember, I have always had big dreams and goals, not because anyone forced me to, but because I have never felt at my full potential, and I do not think I ever will. One of my biggest priorities as a student was to get into Yale for college. I have always wanted to study law, the purpose, the journey, and every aspect it drew me in. And because of that, I came to discover Yale and the life-altering success stories and scholars it produced. It was and still is my dream school, so I poured all of my effort into creating the most well-rounded and appealing college application. Although I did thoroughly enjoy most of the things I participated in, there was a subtle or significant motive behind this activity dedicated to the decoration of my resume. This was my life drive and dream. I did everything possible in my power to achieve this goal and then the day finally came to receive my application result. Each day leading up to this moment grew with anxiety and shrunk with motivation. It became the center, breath, and gravity that held me to this earth, I learned the effects of every kind of drug in school, yet my obsession with perfection and image was my own personal brand of heroin. This addiction defined me and when perfection started to falter, I was lost. I opened the results email and studied it carefully, scanning, panicking, and then I finally saw it. “We regret to inform you…” the words became a blur as my eyes began to tear up. Absolute devastation and failure does not begin to describe my emotions. The thing I dedicated and handed my life purpose to was over, my dream shattering and me along with it.
That should have been what I felt in that life-altering moment, instead, I felt nothing, emptiness, perhaps slight disappointment, but the grief, the pain, the desperation never set in. That was when I realized rejection from my dream college was not even a quarter as soul-wrenching as the many other pains in my life. You see, my time leading up to this dreaded day were the hardest day I have ever experienced, and not because of my anticipation about these results. If I am being honest, it barely brushed my mind. It was the losing my friend to suicide and my teacher a week later, the passing of my grandfather to prostate cancer, the being sexually assaulted at a shell gas station coming home from dance practice and never telling a soul, and the complete detaching from my family and friends. I became so cold and aloof to my surroundings my faith and beliefs wavered.
Receiving that rejection letter woke me up and helped me realize that I am stronger than I could have imagined, and this rejection did not define who I am. It was a liberating moment that renewed my outlook on my life. Through my journey of participating in the multitudes of activities in my life such as piano, international Latin ballroom dancing, mock trial, mission trips, and many more. I have carried these developed skills and knowledge into college and have continued each as a hobby. I used to view these activities as burdens, but I am beyond happy to say that I incorporate them into my life as joyful past times. Now in my first year of college, I am a pre-law student, aspiring new model that got signed with two agencies and have the best friends I could ever ask for. There is no denying the impediments and life struggles I continue to encounter, but I find comfort in my past experiences that have shaped me to be who I am today.
Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?
I have been dancing for over 13 years of my life, and now at the age 18, I am at the Gold pre-professional level for International Latin Ballroom dancing. I was originally trained in Vietnam at four years old along with adults because there were no dance schools specialized in ballroom for children at the time. As I progressed, ballroom became more popular, and I was able to compete with other kids my age at the national level. My love for dance began at a young age and has continued to become enhanced as I discover new skills and knowledge about this beautiful form of art. Throughout my career, I have competed in over 40 competitions at the national and international level. Upon participating in these competitions, I have acquired many gold medals and won scholarships competing against competitors the same age and older than me. Among my most prized awards is the “Best Youth” nomination during the United States Dance Competition in 2020. I love dancing and hope to continue on my journey to compete as a professional Latin dancer in the most famous dance competition known as “Black Pool”.
In terms of your work and the industry, what are some of the changes you are expecting to see over the next five to ten years?
I am currently a pre-law student majoring in Finance and am still learning what the market trends will be.
Contact Info:
- Website: isabelladegenhardt.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/isabelladegenhardt/
